Thursday, 24 November 2011

Day 39

Last night other half considerably taken back by replacement of mantle clock.  Said she didn't like the events one jot, but was very pleased to have her clock back.  Other half most confused by note with regards to my assistance, but thankfully took this to mean the occasion of offering her a cup of tea one morning.

Had call from boss at crack of dawn this morning, even before other half had left for work.  Thought this distinctly unprofessional, but boss seemed most eager.  Said he was bound to ask about visit from Law last week.  Thought this highly mystifying on account of not having told a soul about it.  Ventured to ask where he got this information, and was horrified to be told from local newspaper.

After some background rustling and evidently amused communication with Horseface, proceeded to quote article, titled "Neighbourhood Watcher Hoodwinks Homeworker", opening:

"Hapless Homeworker helped Neighbourhood Watcher strike another property in the area this week.  Unavailable for comment, graphic designer and tin head telecommuter reportedly acted as lookout post for The Watcher and aided in escape, holding up local law enforcement."

Boss said as I was the only graphic designer homeworker he knew of, assumed it to be me.  Much too enraged to deny accusation, admitted it was indeed me, and held that newspaper fearfully inaccurate as to details, no less than expected from local rag.

Boss signed off with "Speak to you later, Batman, or should I call you Joker?" with much background laughter from Horseface not helping situation in slightest.

Inevitably other half asked about reason for calling so early, and was forced to tell of minor miscommunication with regards to shutting door in Sergeant's face, being dragged into suspicious old couple's house by my collar and finally seeing The Neighbour Watcher disappear over fence.  Other half looked most serious during this discourse, and when finished frowned considerably.  Then burst into raucous laughter with no respite for endless minutes, further justification on how jolly confusing situation was only making laughter worse.  Finally packed other half off to work with tears of laughter in her eyes.  Asked if she could withhold telling work colleagues, said she could make no promises, prompting further laughter.

Thought considerably about calling newspaper and giving them quite generous piece of my mind, but thinking better of it decided anonymity was best policy.

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