Most impressive service from organic shop. Received email from other half mid-morning saying they would drop the bird off same day. Thought this almost worth the extra price and spent a good deal of the morning clearing space in the fridge.
Just before lunch heard knock at the door and Mrs Payne's chit-chat to poor soul that happened upon our doorstep, and went to investigate. Saw delivery boy holding basket and went with pride to see crowning glory of Christmas dinner.
Most disappointed to see rather straggly specimen, looking distinctly as a bird perhaps concerned of its weight and had been on a diet for some time. If ever there was an anorexic turkey, this was indeed it. Profoundly downhearted, made query as to health of bird, however quite furious with reply saying,
"That's what shape they are, haven't you seen one before, mister?".
Cut him off saying yes I jolly well had, and further, certainly would not be accepting such a bird. He could either bring another one or we would be having quite considerable words with his boss. Added if organic meant less meat than a drumstick he could bally well keep it.
Mrs Payne joined in at this point, and although not professing herself to be an expert on such matters, went through some considerable discourse to declare it to be just as expected. At this boy took his advantage with a sharp "See!" in reply.
At this boy said I could be his guest talking to his boss, and if I wasn't accepting it he had other deliveries for people that "know a goose from a gander". Took some offence at this and told him I would indeed be talking to his boss at earliest opportunity.