Awfully tired this morning having had Christmas quiz at local pub last night. Completely forgot until other half reminded me and did absolutely no quiz book reading beforehand. Felt most concerned would let Horseface down.
Got to the pub where we had dinner, with Mrs Payne and other half having most healthy portions. Declared they were being ever so good as they chased peas around their plates.
Horseface and boss arrived just before quiz, one looking distinctly more serious about the affair than the other.
"I hope you're ready to win, Robert", Horseface opened with. Boss just sighed.
Were informed that quiz was such that in the case of a draw a tie breaker question would be asked, with the tied teams electing who should answer it from opposing teams. This being the case Horseface and I had unfortunately news for Mrs Payne that she would not be able to be part of our team should she be chosen. Seemed not bothered by this in the slightest and moved to adjacent table and proceeded to order dessert. Other half most displeased by this, and spent good portion of the quiz looking longingly at Mrs Payne eating dessert.
Prior to starting, who should walk in but the old codger from the radio quiz. Finding the place quite full, asked Mrs Payne if he and his wife (must have been pushing on 80 at least) might join her. I looked over and smiled and nudged Horseface who did the same. Codger looked blankly for some moments, before making some gesture of vague recollection and looked towards his wife in confusion.
Quiz started by handing out blank answer sheets, and profoundly amused to see question sheet requested by Codger and Mrs Codger, and further to see them invite Mrs Payne to play with them. Mrs Payne quite seriously involved in dessert, however took a moment to say she would be delighted.
Our team, 'Homeless Bob and the Charity Cases' (highly displeased by this name), positively giggled through entire quiz on what terrible competitors we had next to us. Managed to answer quite confidently 20 questions as read out by landlord and eagerly awaited results.
Some time passed before results, evidently to allow for another round of drinks to be purchased, which duly occurred. Other half made quiet consideration of dessert menu, but made her aware of her diet. Called me a spoilsport.
Answers were finally read out, and dismayed to find we were joint first with no other than Codger & Co (my name, not theirs, should add). Horseface looked most furious but rallied the troops and gave most stern pep talk on virtues of "jolly well THINKING before you answer and you better not get it wrong".
Now came the time for us to pick who on the opposite team we would chose to answer the tie breaker question. Quite obvious selection for us, knowing Codger's reasonable pedigree and being unsure of Mrs Codger's potential, chose Mrs Payne, whose inability with regards to quizzing we were all abundantly clear on. Surprisingly, Codger & Co selected me. Was now quite clear Codger didn't have clue who I was.
Mrs Payne and I both standing up in front of whole pub, question was then set by landlord. Will record here:
"K, O, P, O. What is the number?"
Quite baffled by this, quickly set into heated panic. Looked at Mrs Payne, quietly focused, and absolutely nothing came to mind. Then worst possible thing happened, Mrs Payne erupted with pleasure and her answer, and was instantly announced correct. They had won.
Sat back down most dejected. Dared not look at Horseface, and could quite tell upon saying goodbye shortly after that was quite furious.
Had worse fate, however, in humiliation of having to ask Mrs Payne where she got her answer from. Also furious of reply that she wouldn't tell me! Made quite sure, however, to quietly giggle to herself on entire journey home, despite other half and I in depleted silence, me at quiz, and other half at lack of dessert.
Further more this morning, now quite certain of shenanigans with regards to advent calendar. Made particular note as to not eating chocolate this morning, and yet again chocolate had quite disappeared when I went to retrieve it. Have made judicious relocation of calendar in between some books quite out of sight.