Spent good deal of morning telephoning plumbers, altogether more difficult task than explaining water board do not provide hot water to Mrs Payne. Finally got through to chap, said he would come out promptly, would be here by 10 o'clock.
At 11 o'clock, bound to say was awfully shamed by Mrs Payne, who, still in dressing gown, opening door to plumber, and demanded,
"Are you from the board? Where's my hot water!".
Explained to rather shocked plumber was terribly sorry, but please come through to see boiler, as would be terribly grateful in returning it to working operation.
Proceeded laborious diagnosis, further hampered by Mrs Payne asking at every opportunity whether it was yet fixed, and what various componentry was. Awfully tired of this so declared was going to work, and would they be so good as to let me know when complete. Mrs Payne said she would fill the bath with the kettle.
Furious to come down for lunch to find gas man altogether disappeared, and Mrs Payne in most jovial mood having had bath, now tinkering with boiler, cover removed. Said in no uncertain terms that was awfully dangerous, and such machinery should only be operated by certified professionals. Further, where was gas man? Was told had gone to get a replacement item, with time unspecified as to return. Mrs Payne added boiler awfully simple contraption, and had boiled water on stove as a girl, and really could not be much different. Replied this profoundly inaccurate, and in any case needed proper tools, was entirely convinced sink plunger most useless of devices. This explained as needing something,
"in case any water came at me". Said it was time for lunch.