Back from mobile telephone shop, and bound to say event positive nightmare.
Seeing easy prey, teenage shop assistant all too happy to help, set about showing various options in catalogue at quite frightful prices. Mrs Payne explained would not want to spend all too much, in fact particular model on counter looked most suitable. Assistant said was terribly sorry, that was calculator.
Mrs Payne paid no attention to this, set about looking at various telephones on display, proceeding to hold each to ear, and utter,
"Hello?". Eventually turned to assistant and I at count, exclaimed,
"I say, there's no one there!".
Followed much discussion as to telephones' suitability, with all declared rather too small. Mrs Payne said could barely see the words and little pictures. This tested by holding device some inches from face, as had forgotten glasses.
Eventually came across suitable device, perfect in size and all too easy to see. Mrs Payne most pleased with this, said it did look rather smart, and could see why was called a smart-phone. At this Mrs Payne asked to see my mobile telephone, and declared looked quite ridiculous in comparison. Explained to assistant that I was fearful bore.
Promptly left shop with Mrs Payne clutching new mobile telephone and me carrying bag. Looked on the device much pleasure, said she wondered when would receive her first transmission. Too exasperated to respond.