Settled yesterday, as Mrs Payne meandered away, that would jolly well find out her whereabouts should Mrs Payne disappear after breakfast again this morning. Made quite clear cared not a jot for Mrs Payne's whereabouts at breakfast, asking not a thing about her morning. Instead, quietly plotted how I should go about tracking her. Bound to say, as I weighed the various exits to our home, felt ever so like James Bond, 007.
This morning, quite elated as Mrs Payne left table rather quickly at breakfast, said was going out. Replied by way of alibi had quite fearful amount of work, as watched Mrs Payne totter out of front door. As door closed, in quite sharpest manner, retrieved coat, and was out of back door like a flash, hearing only other half's voice behind me,
"I say, Robert! What the bally!".
Thought as I stalked carefully down drive should have involved Moneypenny, all too late as chase was now on, although very much of tortoise and hare. Had to dash altogether quickly behind dust bin making terrible noise as in several minutes, Mrs Payne had barely got to end of drive. At this precarious moment, other half came out from back door, said in awfully loud voice,
"I say, Robert! I say, what the bally!". Hushing other half altogether unwise, looked fearfully angry as heard Mrs Payne's voice in distance,
"Is everything alright, dear?". Followed quite some conversation, shouting down drive Mrs Payne commented as to me being a fearful idiot, as I slowly got up and stalked into house in utmost fury. Quite certainly James Bond, 007, does not have such frightful mother-in-law.