Went shopping earlier regards Christmas goose. Had quite fearful trouble last year on account of being too late, so making quite sure as to getting one. Mrs Payne altogether in Christmas mood, said was terribly exciting, might she come along? Replied certainly could, however might she put shoes on, slippers most unsuitable. Mrs Payne most displeased at this, saying with annoyance,
"No-one would notice!"
In farm shop Mrs Payne positively dazzled by such fine food. Was thrilled to the core as young lady asked might she like little free sample of pork pie. Said regally she rather thought she would. Helped herself to three.
Most surprised as Mrs Payne said she knew thing or two about goose, might she select the bird? Replied did not have faintest idea myself, would certainly appreciate such help. At this Mrs Payne delighted, went straight up to counter, retrieving two more pork pie samples on way, as girl said with frightful rudeness,
"Oi!" Ignoring this, Mrs Payne exclaimed with pleasure,
"We'd like your biggest goose please!" Shop owner and I most displeased at such reckless purchasing, queried as to what variety. Mrs Payne pondered rather as she ate her pieces of pork pie, finally outstretching her arms by way of indication, and quite ignoring question, said optimistically,
"This big!" Shop owner did best by way of providing bird "this big", with Mrs Payne most pleased with the bird shown. Queried with concern on fitting in oven, as Mrs Payne said with delight,
"Oh yes, I know a thing or two about gooses!"