Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Day 273

Came downstairs yesterday evening to find Mrs Payne in kitchen staring at small plate of biscuits, at which was asked if looked homemade.  Declared certainly did not, looked quite fearfully manufactured, by the by, might I have one?  Positively hours before dinner.  Mrs Payne and I silently cleared the plate, after which Mrs Payne said brightly,
"What if I.." before vigorously bashing the remaining packet on table, exclaiming as she tipped out biscuits,
"That will make them look more irregular!"  At this quite avalanche of crumbs escaped onto plate and table, with Mrs Payne said in disappointment,
"Oh" adding after some moments, "that will never do."

Bound to say ate the crumbs as waited for other half to come home for dinner, Mrs Payne perusing recipe book regards biscuits.  Other half rather pleased upon hearing about mother joining W.I, querying carefully,
"Do you think they'll know about your .. 'past'?"  Mrs Payne most affronted with this, exclaiming in annoyance,
"I'm not a criminal!"  Other half positively rolled around as, having finished biscuit crumbs, I exclaimed brightly,
"We shall let the courts decide!"  Mrs Payne furious.

Positively fearful evening, with other half helping mother rather as one would help child with homework.  Mrs Payne petulant throughout, saying as offered them sherry,
"Robert, might you help with biscuits?  I'm fearfully bored."  Thought this rather jolly affair, and promptly set about rolling and cutting biscuits, dashing tray after tray in and out of oven such that had quite pile of delicious biscuits by midnight.  Not ashamed to say one or two rapidly eaten.

Mrs Payne positively asleep through most of this work, with other half quietly waking mother around midnight.  At this Mrs Payne stirred, started rather, exclaimed in slumber "Hat! My hat!" and waking, looked at biscuits with much pleasure, said we were ever so good, promptly sampled one.  Other half exclaimed with yawn was time for bed, at which Mrs Payne exclaimed with concern,
"We haven't made the vol au vents yet!"

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